Brother and Sister (Update for February 4, 2016)

Today, I didn't send Sam an "I love you" text first thing this morning. Knowing it is two hours earlier there, and that I wanted him to sleep, I waited until 11:24 a.m. It was a long morning.

When I didn't hear from him, I waited until exactly 11:36 a.m. before I sent Bridget a text.

Molly and Sam

Then, at 12:55 p.m., I received a text from Bridget. They had just woke up. Sam had an uncomfortable night, with night sweats. They didn't sleep well. That means I got to worry all day. As if I wasn't before, now I am really looking forward to Sam's PCP visit tomorrow, to get his salt levels and an update on his meds.

Later I got another text from Bridget, excited because their new mattress topper arrived today. It's the little things to make Sam comfortable that Bridget worries about.

After Sam's doctor's appointment tomorrow, he will be home resting for the weekend. His PT, OT and speech therapy starts Monday. His father is leaving this weekend, and then, starting next week the "Sam Sitters" will be on hand to help Bridget. It will be good for Sam and her to get into their routine. We've decided that Molly will wait to go to Portland with me when I return. We both want to be there for Sam's next surgery.

Sam and Molly, always laughing

I'm fortunate to have two beautiful and brilliant children, and even more fortunate they have been life-long best friends. They share a love of music, movies and good literature. They both have a way with words, and majored in English. I don't remember them arguing much when they were children, instead they were always looking out for each other. When Sam feels like talking on the phone these days, it's only his sister's voice he wants to hear. No two people ever laugh more when they are together. I'm looking forward to hearing the laughter and seeing them together in a few weeks.

A few weeks looks like forever from here. I'm feeling disconnected and anxious, wanting to see my son, hear his voice and give him a hug or two. It's a helpless feeling, and Oregon seems so far away. I just take deep breaths.

Sam has always been active, athletic, so I know sitting quietly, worrying about his balance and being dizzy must be somewhat frustrating. When Sam was about 4 years old, I bought him a little basketball goal for $10 from a yard sale up the street. After that, he played basketball, in the living room by himself, about three hours every day. He would dribble and dunk, over and over again. As he got older, that little goal moved to his bedroom, and then dribble and dunk, dribble and dunk. Eventually, he was much taller than the goal, but it continued to be one of his prize possessions. When I was turning his room into a guest room, after he moved to Oregon, he said that the only thing he wanted to make sure I always kept was that little basketball goal (I might have kept a few more things ...). The goal is here, at his childhood home, waiting for him to take a few shots. Best $10 I ever spent.

Sam and Molly

My long-time friends and co-workers, Joy and Mark, brought a delicious dinner and goodies to Dan and I for dinner tonight. Besides the fact that we've worked at the same company for many years, Sam babysat their sons one summer, many years ago. Sam is great with kids, and the "guys" all enjoyed hanging out together. It's one of the many things I love about Little Rock; we're all connected in many ways, and my friends are constant. We didn't just meet, we don't barely know each other —we have roots here. We know each other's children, families and history. It's a special feeling, and Joy and Mark reminded me of that tonight.

Thank you again for getting to know my son, and reading this blog about his journey home.